My Spiral Back to Self

I figured out what my problem is. I hate people. I hate company. It's beginning to show as I'm finding it hard to pretend. Everybody engages you when they want something from you. There's hardly any mutual gain from it. Messes up the balance scale. It's not healthy to pretend to be someone you are not. Life is not an acting career. Just be your true self and dissipate into the background. Don't ever try to get out. Just do what makes you happy. Even though you cannot have everything you want. Make do with what you have.

We are so tiny in this universe, but not insignificant. At this moment, what I assume I need is actually what I want. Cause' I don't deserve what I want. And I'm beginning to wonder if I'll ever deserve it.